Fwd: FW: Chetan Bhagat's Article for Indian Women (A nice artile from Connect)

" Alright, this is not cool at all. A recent survey by Nielsen has revealed that Indian wom! en are the most stressed out in the world: 87% of our women feel stressed out most of the time. This statistic alone has caused me to stress out. Even in workaholic America, only 53% women feel stressed.

What are we doing to our women? I'm biased, but Indian women are the most beautiful in the world. As mothers, sisters, daughters, colleagues, wives and girlfriends - we love them. Can you imagine life without the ladies?

For now, i want to give Indian women five suggestions to reduce their stress levels.

One, don't ever think you are without power. Give it back to that mother-in-law. Be who you are, not someone she wished you would be. She doesn't like you? That's her problem.

Two, if you are doing a good job at work and your boss doesn't value you - tell him that, or quit. Talented, hard-working people are much in demand.

Three, educate yourself, learn skills, network - figure out ways to be economically independent. So ! next time your husband tells you that you are not a good enough wife, mother or daughter-in-law, you can tell him to take a hike.

Four, do not ever feel stressed about having a dual responsibility of family and work. It is difficult, but not impossible. The trick is not to expect an A+ in every aspect of your life. You are not taking an exam, and you frankly can't score cent per cent (unless you are in SRCC, of course). It is okay if you don't make four dishes for lunch, one can fill their stomach with one. It is okay if you don't work until midnight and don't get a promotion. Nobody remembers their job designation on their dying day.

Five, most important, don't get competitive with other women. Someone will make a better scrapbook for her school project than you. Another will lose more weight with a better diet. Your neighbour may make a six-dabba tiffin for her husband, you don't - big deal. Do your best, but don't keep looking out for the report card, and defin! itely don't expect to top the class. There is no ideal woman in this world, and if you strive to become one, there will be only one thing you will achieve for certain - stress.

So breathe, chill, relax. Tell yourself you are beautiful, do your best and deserve a peaceful life. Anybody trying to take that away from you is making a mistake, not you. Your purpose of coming to this earth is not to please everyone. Your purpose is to offer what you have to the world, and have a good life in return. The next time this survey comes, i don't want to see Indian women on top of the list. I want them to be the happiest women in the world. Now smile, before your mother-in-law shouts at you for wasting your time reading the newspaper."

Cherish Womanhood…….

A Tale to Understand - Love and Marriage

A student asks a teacher,
"What is love?"

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back. But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the field, went through the first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wondered.... may be there is a bigger one later. So he moved on...

Then he saw another bigger one... but may be there is an even bigger one waiting for me, he thought.

Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he started to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he knew he had missed the biggest one, and he regretted.

Disappointed, he went back to the teacher empty handed.

The teacher told him, "...this is love... you keep looking for a better one, but later you realise, you have already missed the right person...."

"What is marriage then?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, once again go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the same rule applies: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

Again, the student went to the corn field, and this time he was careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reached the middle of the field, he picked one medium corn that he felt satisfied with, and came back to the teacher.

The teacher told him, "mm...this time you brought back a corn.... good, so you looked for the one that was just nice, and you had a great belief and trust that this is the best one you could get.... this is marriage."!!

REFLECTION
Love manifests, not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly, and this feeling develops with mutual trust in eachother. To love someone is to see a miracle in them which is invisible to the others.

It is a gift of one's inner most soul to another so that both can be whole. It has nothing to do with what we are expecting to get, but only with what we are expecting to give - which is everything.

Love is a flower which ripens into the fruit at marriage. Marriage is that love personified. The real act of marriage takes place in the heart, not in the temple or church or wedding hall. It's a choice we make, not just on our wedding day, but over and over again and that choice is reflected in the way we treat our husband or wife.

Success in marriage is much more than finding the right person, it is a matter of being the right person! What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much on how compatible we are, but how much we can deal with incompatibilities.

A successful marriage often requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. The more we invest in marriage, the more valuable it becomes.

Do not marry the person whom you think you can live with, marry the person whom you think you cant live without!

Perseverance

Through the transformation of a tiny insect that once crawled to a brilliantly coloured creature that can fly, nature gently unfolds the message: 'Good things come to those who wait' and inspires us to persevere.

Feeling low...

It's there at times... if not often... the sinking feeling... the feeling that's described as "feeling low". It can happen due to anything: things not going your way, friends loose touch, misunderstandings, arguments, relationships falling short of expectations... anything... It can happen for any reason... or even for no reason at all. It's difficult to explain. And at times even more difficult to get over it. What to do? What do I do?

I... umm (would need to reflect)... I guess I sometimes talk to a friend... sometimes go online and surf for something that interests me... sometimes I scan the day's newspaper... sometimes I blog... at times it helps... at times it doesn't... this seems to be one of those days...

Justice denied, yet victorious: Aruna Shaunbaug

Not too late after the movie Guzaarish brought the topic of Euthanasia (mercy killing or Physician Assisted Suicide (PAS)) into limelight, the case of Aruna Shanbaug resurfaced adding a spark to the debate. In layman's terminology, Euthanasia is the bringing about of the gentle death of a patient in the case of a painful, chronic and incurable disease. Now, those who argue about Euthanasia allow equal importance to all these adjectives. A painful disease is one in which the patient suffers unbearable and excruciating pain. A chronic disease is a long lasting one and an incurable disease is one whose cure has not been found till date.

For the uninitiated, Aruna Shaunbaug was a nurse at Mumbai's King Edward Memorial (KEM) Hospital who was a victim of a brutal sexual attack 37 years ago. On the night of 27th November 1973, Aruna's, then a 25 yr old pretty, bubbly girl, dreaming of marrying her fiance - a young doctor colleague, world was shattered when Sohanlal Bhartha Walmiki, a ward boy, who resented being castigated by Aruna for his misdemeanors, decided to extract a cold blooded revenge. He attacked her one night in the hospital basement as she was changing out of her uniform before going home. He tied a dog chain round her neck, choking her, cutting off the blood supply to her brain and sodomized her. Then he left her lying there and went away, but not before robbing her of her earrings. Next day, Aruna was discovered by a cleaner, unconscious, lying in a pool of blood. It was then realised that the assault and resulting asphyxiation with the dog chain had left her cortically blind, speechless and paralysed due to a brain stem and cervical cord injury. Since that fateful day, Aruna has been lying in an irreversible vegetative state. Her own family and her fiance gave up on her and for these 37 years, she has been kept alive and cared for by the nurses at the KEM hospital. She faded from public memory untill 1998, when journalist Pinki Virani wrote 'Aruna's Story', a book that brought her back into the public consciousness.

Now, having heard about this case, I was also curious as to know what happened to the ward boy who has been responsible for bringing a beautiful and charming junior nurse to this despicable condition. A simple google search was enough to find out that the devil, whose momentary "pleasure" ruined the life of this girl, actually got away without even being charged for "rape". The police case was registered as a case of robbery and attempted murder on account of the concealment of anal rape by the doctors, perhaps to avoid the social rejection of the victim, and her impending marriage. Walmiki was caught and convicted, and served seven-year sentence for assault and robbery, not for rape or sexual molestation, nor for the "unnatural sexual offence" (which could have got him a ten-year sentence by itself). He got just 7 years of sentence while his victim got 37 years of agony and counting.

I feel disgust for this man from deepest cores of my heart and I wonder if guilt is even allowing him to lead a normal life. For certainly, life is not normal for 61 year old Aruna. She deserved a normal life: marriage, kids, old age, grandkids, etc. which obviously did not happen due to this one man. However, even though she was denied justice, Aruna has been victorious. She might not know about it, being in a persistent vegetative state and unable to communicate in any manner, but she was responsible in making life a bit easier for other nurses. Following the attack, nurses in Mumbai went on strike demanding improved conditions for Shanbaug and better working conditions for themselves, which were granted to them.

Now, coming to the issue being debated today. Pinki Virani, on Aruna's behalf, filed a plea with the Supreme Court of India to end Aruna's life and requested that the hospital be asked to stop force-feeding Aruna to allow her to "die with dignity". The plea was admitted in the Supreme Court in December 2009. The plea was opposed strongly by the doctors and nurses at the KEM hospital as well the Indian government. On 24th January 2011, after she had been in this status for 37 years, the Supreme Court of India responded to the plea by setting up a medical panel to examine her. Though the medical panel admitted in its report that the chances of Aruna coming out of this painful, comatose condition are very low, the court turned down the mercy killing petition on 7th March, 2011. However in its landmark judgment, it allowed passive euthanasia in India. "Active euthanasia is illegal," the judges ruled on Monday, but added: "Passive euthanasia is permissible under certain conditions, but it should be done under the supervision of the High Court." This is yet again a victory for patiets like Aruna. Though for Aruna, the courts answer is in the negetive. For to be considered, the plea should be filed by the people taking care of the patient suffering from this extreme and painful conditions. In Aruna's case, the plea was actually opposed strongly by the doctors and nurses at the KEM hospital as well the Indian government.

Aruna lost the case and her caretakers distributed sweets for her "re-birth". However, in a first step towards legalising euthanasia, The Law Commission of India, Ministry of Law and Justice has decided to recommend to the Indian Government to allow terminally ill to end their lives. On 7th March, 2011, the government said a serious debate was needed on the issue of euthanasia as there were no laws at present on it in the country. Then again, it needs to be ensured that the law is not misused for killing people.

Now, why am I calling it a victory? For I do believe in allowing Euthanasia on a case-by-case basis. In Aruna's case, my answer is a big "Yes". (Let me mention here, that my answer was not that confident a "Yes" in case of Ethan Mascrenhas in Guzaarish for even though there could be no doubt as to the suffering of Ethan, he was a jolly natured person who spread happiness, joy and hope. But, Aruna's suffereing is hidden from none.) Such painful existence is worse than death. Every person has a right to live. Even the opponents of Euthanasia would agree with me on that. But, if a person has a right to live, he/she has a right to live with dignity, he/she has a right to live with respect and honour. And, as a corollary, if a person has a right on his/her life, he/she has a right on his/her death. He/she has a right to choose if life is becoming a burden, the mode of putting an end to the same. He/she has a right to choose to die if his/her life is becoming the albatross on his/her neck. Every person has a right to die with dignity. So does Aruna. Then, again, my argument should not be taken to mean that suicides should also be allowed. I only mean to say that when there are valid and established reasons to believe that the person seeking death has no hope of a normal dignified life, he/she sould be allowed to rest in peace. Life has to be meaningful, whether sick or healthy, a person has the right to know and understand that he/she is alive and for this reason. When there is no such knowledge or understanding, the person can choose to leave life and rise to peace.

Now that a well-known person, a celebrity like Hrithik Roshan has spoken in favour of Aruna, let's just hope that the public understands the concern better and come out in support of Aruna. Till then we can only pray for her.

Happy Women's Day!

You can do almost anything you put your mind to... You can swim the deepest ocean and climb the highest peak... Be a doctor or fly a plane... You can face adversity and still walk tall... You are strong, beautiful, compassionate and much more than words could ever say!


Today is yours, and so is ever other day.

Happy Women's Day!

Some Interesting facts

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.
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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
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Coca-Cola was originally green.
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It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
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The percen tage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% ( now get this...)
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
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The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
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The average number of people airborne over the US any given hour: 61,000
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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
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The world's youngest parents were 8 and 9 and lived in China in 1910.
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The youngest pope was 11 years old.
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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
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Those San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
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Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David,
Hearts - Charlemagne,
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
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111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987, 654,321
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If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle.
If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle.
If the horse has al l four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
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Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th:
John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.
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"I am." is the shortest complete sentence in the English language.
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Hershey's Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it's kissing the conveyor belt.
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Q. What occurs more often in December than any other month?
A. Conception.
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Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
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Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested?
A. Obsession
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Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand
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Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All invented by women.
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Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
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Q. There are more collect calls on this day than any other day of the year?
A. Father's Day
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Q. What trivia fact about Mel Blanc (voice of Bugs Bunny) is the most ironic?
A. He was allergic to carrots.
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Q. What is an activity performed by 40% of all people at a party?
A. Snoop in your medicine cabinet.
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In Shakespeare' s time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes.
When you pulled on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on.
Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight".
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It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding,
the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink.
Mead is a honey beer and because their calendarwaslunar based,
this period was called the honey month we know today as the honeymoon.
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In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts. So in old England,
when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them mind their own pints and quarts and settle down.
It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
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Many years ago in England, pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim or handle of their ceramic cups.
When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service.
"Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
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In Scotland, a new game was invented.
It was entitled Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden... .
and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
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At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow
Did you try it?