Every time around Dussehra, it has become a routine since last few years now. There are social media posts about how what Ravan did to Sita was not "as offensive as it is deemed to be". Many of these posts are forwarded messages with anonymous authors and I will not get into the discussion about who is spreading them (honestly, I know where that discussion would go). But basically many ladies of the current generation are also sharing these same messages and talking about it. And that's where my main concern is that how can a woman be okay with what Ravan did to Sita.
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| Ravi Verma's Ravana Sita and Jatayu |
The messages say how Ravan really gave Sita more respect as compared to Ram. He never touched her without her consent and on the other hand Ram made her go through Agni pariksha to prove her "purity". Maybe it's just a fad or a supposed demonstration of how intellectual, liberal thinking you are that you are questioning your own scriptures and rituals, or maybe your ideas of Feminism include putting down Ram for questioning his wife's purity by showing his arch enemy as a better human being than him; but even in modern day and context, Ravan's actions are totally unpardonable.
I myself have often questioned about many of Ram's actions and the way he and others treated Sita and ladies in general and have openly expressed how the scriptures are not in alignment with the ideas of feminism. So, I guess that should prove that I am not saying and writing this just because I am a Hindu and I-will-support-my-Hindu-scriptures-to-death kind of syndrome.
However, preaching greatness of Ravan because of how he "treated Sita with respect and didn't touch her without her wishes" is totally out of tune with the ideas of feminism and of basic humanity even. That's incomplete knowledge of the scripture too. The scripture explains how Ravan had once raped an "Apsara" and had been given a curse that if he ever touched another woman without her consent, his head will blow up. He did not touch Sita because he feared for his life. Rest, he did everything unacceptable and he tortured her to coerce her in many ways. The female guards ensured Sita was bound to a place and were always taunting and mentally harassing her. She was put in a garden and her movement were restrained. She was pressurised every single day to give in and marry him (symbolic of consent).
Please put yourself in Sita's shoes and think whether in that situation day after day, you will feel respected or humiliated and abused. Kidnapped, kept isolated, locked (in a garden but still contained) and constantly being pressurised to marry someone she did not want to marry. How is that the idea of treating someone with respect? The people who think so need to understand that this is just another way of saying "boys will be boys... He liked her so he did all that stuff but hey, he didn't rape her, did he?"
Maybe the whole narrative is about changing the perspective about questioning Ram for asking Sita to prove her purity but then the same cannot be highlighted by justifying the acts of Ravan. Both acts were questionable and Ravan's acts deserved punishment too. The posts always mention that Ravan was such a learned man and yet all his wisdom and knowledge did not serve any useful purpose when it came to Sita.
